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Zirconium
1-250.03.045.4 Zirconium provingMind- I was troubled once again by the feeling that I couldn’t think of anything special to say in front of my colleagues [uncertainty, stage 4]. Later on in the evening I am on the phone to someone and I rattle on for more than an hour.Dreams- I am sitting around the table with my clinical training group. I had enjoyed reading an article about an octopus and I want to share this with my friends. But I don’t know how to go about it [uncertain, a.o. stage 4]. Eventually I just read it to them, at least I am trying to read, but it is almost dark and I can hardly see. But even when the light is turned on I hardly manage. I am reading like a primary school child, stammering and hesitating, moving my finger along the lines. Suddenly there are no more letters, only pictures with an exclamation mark. It is a complete chaos. This way I will never be able to share what is so important to me. This means that I find it hard to just ‘be’, to feel accepted and to show what I can do.
The paradox is that by not expressing myself I am bursting with ideas and at the same time I feel as if I have got nothing to offer, as if I won’t be taken seriously (I don’t know how much of this belongs to the remedy, because I recognise it very much as being part of me).
- Something to do with a castle [Silver and Gold series]. We are camping outside the gates [Stage 4]. I was given an enormous key [Stage 4], but I dropped it in a puddle. It was raining heavily.
- I am riding on the back of my fathers bike and we are passing a bridge [stage 4] in a town that looked like New York [Silver series]. It was sunny; half way [Stage 4] along the bridge [Stage 4] it start to get very foggy [Stage 4]. It feels good.
- I am cleaning a classroom and a kitchen after taking part in workshop that lasted several days [Silver and Iron series] (Scouts?).
- Early during the night, about 1 o’clock, I felt sexually very aroused [Silver, Gold series].
- I was at a wedding [Official start, Stage 4] where three couples were getting married at the same time. It all happened outside in a large meadow. I did not know any of the people there.Complaints- Pain in right eyeball, < pressure, at 11.30 pm.
- Slight nausea after taking the remedy.
- Headache, nagging pain in right eyeball, slowly spreading to forehead and vertex. It started at 4 pm and in the evening it felt as if I was wearing a tight helmet, > pressure on eye and head, > sleep. After the next dose a similar headache on the following afternoon, and after the next dose that evening the pain disappeared. (This was a familiar headache but I hadn’t had it for at least a year).
The paradox is that by not expressing myself I am bursting with ideas and at the same time I feel as if I have got nothing to offer, as if I won’t be taken seriously (I don’t know how much of this belongs to the remedy, because I recognise it very much as being part of me).
- Something to do with a castle [Silver and Gold series]. We are camping outside the gates [Stage 4]. I was given an enormous key [Stage 4], but I dropped it in a puddle. It was raining heavily.
- I am riding on the back of my fathers bike and we are passing a bridge [stage 4] in a town that looked like New York [Silver series]. It was sunny; half way [Stage 4] along the bridge [Stage 4] it start to get very foggy [Stage 4]. It feels good.
- I am cleaning a classroom and a kitchen after taking part in workshop that lasted several days [Silver and Iron series] (Scouts?).
- Early during the night, about 1 o’clock, I felt sexually very aroused [Silver, Gold series].
- I was at a wedding [Official start, Stage 4] where three couples were getting married at the same time. It all happened outside in a large meadow. I did not know any of the people there.Complaints- Pain in right eyeball, < pressure, at 11.30 pm.
- Slight nausea after taking the remedy.
- Headache, nagging pain in right eyeball, slowly spreading to forehead and vertex. It started at 4 pm and in the evening it felt as if I was wearing a tight helmet, > pressure on eye and head, > sleep. After the next dose a similar headache on the following afternoon, and after the next dose that evening the pain disappeared. (This was a familiar headache but I hadn’t had it for at least a year).