Author: Jan Scholten
Retire for autonomy
They have the feeling that they can’t preserve their autonomy fully. The outer forces are too strong, they feel dominated. In order to preserve their autonomy they half-retire. It’s difficult to maintain control in all circumstances, especially when they are not the one in charge, but they don’t really give in. They retire with a feeling of knowing better. They can retire out of the feeling that their powers of self-control are diminishing. They can have the idea that their achievements aren't worth very much anymore.
Retire in inner world
They retire into their inner world. They only show what they want to show. They live half their life in their own world where they are in full control, where they are the boss. They can create a fantasy world of mythology, fairy tales, literature, art, science or whatever.
Nostalgia for autonomy
They can live rather nostalgically. They feel things were better in the past when they were in full control. They can retire in dignity. But they can also do that with a bitter feeling. This feeling can be expressed from time to time in very sharp ways. They can become very cynical and sarcastic. It shows that they are far more developed and wise than other think.
They also develop the idea that what they have done isn't as good as they had previously thought. They can even have the idea that nothing they have done is worth anything. The least criticism means failure. They feel mortification and indignation.
Reduce their self-control
They have the feeling that it’s not necessary or possible to have complete self-control all the time. So they let it go from time to time, saying “Enough is enough”. They can also feel this as a reduction of the ego, in order to let the Self come to expression.
Reducing self-control: sarcasm
They want to retain their power to decide for themselves what they want to do but they don't have enough power to go their own way completely. They can only partly decide for themselves. The contra powers are too strong for them to maintain their own position. They still feel like fighting, at least to some extent. They fight at certain moments and in certain places, when they judge they have power enough. This can also be seen in their verbal fighting. They can express their opinion with sharp remarks. They can be really cynical and sarcastic. It shows that they feel they know better, but cannot hold that opinion completely.
Talent: change opinion fast, according to the situation.
Delusion: it was never good enough, the least mistake means that it was not good enough. The least criticism means failure.
Mortification, indignation from being tackled.
Delusion: being floored, unexpectedly, the chair being pulled from under you.
Uneasy feeling, as if opposing forces act in opposite directions.
Distrust, << broken contact, broken analogy.
Buddhist, having no desires, no problems, no responsibility.
Colour preference: 15-16B.
Corpus callosum, hemispheric de synchronisation.
Optic chiasm, disturbed three-dimensional vision. Dyslexia.
Neck jerking, head jerking.
Shoulder pain, front side of shoulder, under the head of the humerus.
Arms, whole body: trembling, jerking, zigzag feeling.
Lungs: granulomas, pneumoconiosis, bronchitis, pneumonia, tuberculosis.
Chest pressure, heavy, tight, tension. Heart pain, contracted.
Liver problems: necrosis, fatty degeneration; spleen problems.
Male: testis, epididymis, seminal vesicles, infertility.
Female: ovaries, uterus, infertility, miscarriage.
Blood: platelets, coagulation problems.
Myth: Heracles Labor 11: Heracles captures the Cattle of Geryon.