Author: Ai-Ling Su Makewell
Magnesium carbonicum muriaticum_Case 1:
by Ail-Ling Su Makewell
This is a nine month healing journey of a very timid woman. Her name is Rosaline – an attractive, petite, and refined 38 year-old. She came to see me for swollen ear drum. Prior to coming here she had flu, high fever with pains in her legs. She took a flight to another city a week ago, which aggravated her ear problem even further – the left ear weeps fluid and the right one is blocked and unable to hear anything. She had two courses of antibiotics, taken plenty of pain-killers as well as some homoeopathic remedies - Phosphorus, Pulsatilla, Merc-sol. - none of which has worked. She is feeling paranoid and scared.
The first prescription I gave her was Nux-vomica 30C (2 doses) just to clear the plethora of drugs taken. Immediately, there was a sense of wellbeing and feeling really relaxed – a big sigh of relief. One and a half weeks later, Rosaline reported that after the remedy she slept really well, has been able to ask for help when needed, started writing again and using computer. “My voice is stronger and clearer, throat is different, and I am a lot clearer without the fuzzy feelings anymore, amazing changes!” She looks much brighter too.
Rosaline continues to tell me:
“However, the right ear is still blocked, left one is buzzing and ringing. My face is perspiring, very oily. I have a craving for chocolate and can eat a whole block of it in one go – this happened twice.”
“My dreams are very different, they feel very real to me - I am in a car visiting a bank manager, my brother is driving the car. I am very angry. Then, the scene changes to my cutting up a fish, and showing the knife to my mum but there is no violence.”
I had another dream last week:
“a presence walked into my room, he leaned to my left ear saying – ‘Natalie is gone.’ I woke up screaming and couldn’t talk, very frightened though I don’t know who Natalie is.”
Rosaline feels very angry, yet tends to be passive in a relationship – always try to keep peace, then, she ends up exploding (Magnesium) with fury when the anger is bottled up for too long. Her parents are not divorced but it is not a good marriage. She is very scared with a lot of fears. She says that she is friendly, out going, have a lot of friends, and they are all from different social and ethnic groups. She doesn’t eat meat but loves ice creams, fresh and tasty foods, enjoys fish, and used to crunch ice-cubes but they are too cold now. There was an incident between she and her sister four years ago, the sister refused to talk to her since (Phosphorus).
At the moment, she is involved in a legal suit, which has to do with workplace harassment (she is very timid and afraid of giving me more information that could be subpoenaed and used against her in the future). Rosaline also said that she doesn’t really know where she stands in the family; her family (silicium series) is important to her but she doesn’t feel that she belongs there, yet always try to please her parents.
During the course of her coming to see me, she gradually opened up more and more with each visit. This time, she related to me that she has been an anorexic, can’t stomach food very well, she is afraid of other people. Often found being wrongly accused of the things she did not do because she couldn’t and didn’t know how to speak up. Once, she let her friend’s mother humiliate her in front of many people, she stood frozen. Her memory of childhood is vague and blocked.
However, over the nine months period, as she begins to change and develop with the help of the remedies the past memories slowly surfaced. She was thus able to process all of it and heal to become a woman onto herself with towering strength.
This is a case clearly points to the Silicium series - family being the main focus in her life, coupled with a lack of confidence, always try to please others, shy and timid, and not know where one’s place is (in the family) with the tendency to be passive then explodes in anger, which all indicates a second stage development – second stage and the silicium series points to Magnesium. The combination remedy is Phosphorus (many fears, empathetic, sister not speaking to her – sibling issues, have lots of friends, loves ice-cream, crunching ice cubes).
Prescription: Magnesium-phosphoricum 200C.
The sensations after taken the remedy: “feeling is that I ‘sat up’ in my chair (more confident), can feel my feet (more present), feel bigger, peripheral vision is increased (her vision becomes disturbed when under stress). Right shoulder is sore (returning symptom), feeling more comfortable in the chair.” These reactions are immediate.
Over the next five months period, I kept Rosaline on Magnesium-phosphoricum – from 200C to 10M. During that time, she had some very interesting reactions. After she first took the remedy, she said that “as if I have turned into my sister (she is large, angry, no compassion for people). This remedy was just amazing! It shook up my whole world. I am assertive, told my lawyer off for not doing his job. I made appointment to see a psychiatrist so to give my case a better chance. It [Mag-p] shifted me dramatically.” The dreams are very different too. This time she dreamed of keys, now she is in the driver’s seat instead of her brother (the previous dream), the car is a big expensive car – BMW. However, as dramatic as this first remedy had on Rosaline, this journey is by no means an easy one – this is only the beginning of something quite painful, remarkable and transformational.
As the remedy generates changes within her she is also developing more awareness, a lot of forgotten issues came up, dreams are different again, very vivid – “I am standing at the window, a big black wave is in front of me, as if I were waiting for the wave to come in (time frame is now) – [anticipation of the up and coming changes within her]. I am not frightened because I was standing in the white house [her own interior] in the light.”
From analyzing these dream contents alone, one could see that Rosaline is beginning to form a central core self, she is no longer so frightened of everything, she is in charge of her life now (in the driver’s seat), the vehicle is not something meager but of repute and value. Furthermore, she is beginning to shine her own light and it is this inner light that protects and sustains her.
From this point on (2 Ã‚Â½ months into homoeopathic treatment), Rosaline is progressively more able to stand on her own two feet and assert herself. One incidence happened that was the same pattern repeating itself; an acquaintance who was abusive toward her, but instead of being apologetic and running away from the confrontation, as per usual, this time, she responded in a calm, self-assured manner and able to focus on the main issue in question and stood her ground. Although she was shaking from the experience afterward she did not back down. Rosaline continues: “I have been writing even when I am scared I just feel that the remedy gave me the freedom to write, it is life changing, it shifted me unbelievably. Anna was one of my best friends I have always looked up to her. Now I can see the friendship for what really is and reviewed it – I allowed her to take advantage of me in the past but now I had to let her go because I can no longer accommodate this friendship in my present awareness. I now have three new friends and broadened my horizon. I am feeling much stronger inside.”
Slowly, as Rosaline gains more awareness of herself, she begins to tell me about her relationship with her parents. At this stage (5 months into treatment), she felt stuck – not able to get things done or complete anything, has trouble sleeping. She had two visions, which were so very real (she did not elaborate). “My relationship with mum has changed for the better, communication with my brother is also better. Mum speaks to me like an adult now. I also had a meeting with my lawyer, which was very stressful. It shifted some really big stuff – my whole structure. I stood up for myself and was able to stay in my truth. I have also stood up to a few friends and told them how I really felt, which surprised them.”
“However, I am remembering how I was being bullied by dad, sister, brother and put down by them all the time – but didn’t realise that I was bullied. I was bullied at work too [now there is an awareness that the same situation repeats itself no matter where one is]. They called me stupid.” She goes on to say:“For three days, my feet felt as if they were webbed – I am treading water [life situation]” – struggling with the inner changes and the surfacing of the forgotten past.
Prescription: Magnesium-phosphoricum-oxy 200C.
I decided to add the element Oxydatum to the Magnesium-phosphorus combination because of the memory of being abused is coming into consciousness. There was no cause to change the remedy as the Magnesium-phosphorus worked so very well for Rosaline. It brought up the repressed memory of her childhood, as the remedy works its way deeper into her subconscious self, it begins to clear a lot of the past repressed issues slowly. Her own journaling (with the help of the remedy) has also assisted this process – to unfold the past safely and deeply in a gradual manner (this is the reason for my prescribing 200C though traditionally we were taught to give high potency if the pathology is in the mental and the emotional plane. However, I have found that the sudden emergence of repressed memories and anger could do more harm than good. It is much safer for the patient to process the past wounds slowly and gradually). This remedy (Mag-p-oxy) gives Rosaline the feeling of being more grounded, and shifted something within her also.
Three weeks after taking the remedy (Mag-p-oxy), she begins to feel that she has trouble finishing things and is not motivated to do anything. However, during that time, she said that the dreams are real – 3D form. “Dad is different, seems softened a lot, but refuse to look at me though sitting opposite at the dinner table. I am a lot more aware – jumped a massive hurdle – but can’t quite figure out how to get through this.”
Now, Rosaline says that she has never watched TV before, but lately watches it almost every night. She gets scared, feeling anxious and the sensation as if her eyes were disappearing (has experienced this sensation in the past), which is really scary.
I repeated the Magnesium-phosphorus-oxy 200C one dose in consultation, and waited to see if there was any reaction - absolutely no sensation. Obviously, this remedy has done its work, and I need to look for another remedy that fits better. Now begin the process of retaking the case.
Over the past few months, the issue with her father came to light – she and her father have been estranged for a long time, did not talk to each other, he does not even acknowledge her existence though living under one roof (moved back to her parental home after the divorce). This situation did not bother her when she first came to see me as if just matter of fact – something quite normal. Now, she seems to have more awareness and feels that her father seems to deliberately sabotaging her in her effort to get work compensation. At this stage, all her other physical symptoms (e.g. period cramps) are no longer an issue though the right ear still painful from time to time. Just recently, there is a feeling of lack confidence again.
Prescription: Magnesium-carbonicum 200C. Feeling much better, different, really relaxed. My head feels different, as if the face is changed – feels softer.
Three weeks later on her returning visit, Rosaline says: “There is a big massive shift within me” – looking very confident and pleased with herself. She stood up for herself to assert her rights (the person who gave a course did not fulfill her end of the contract – basically, didn’t deliver the course). Rosaline was able to do so because she was very clear about where she stands – she spoke in her usual soft voice but firm. During the three weeks, her mother also validated her, the lawyer who took her case in work cover issue has stepped-up and become more responsive. She continues: “this is the first time that I didn’t feel the fear when my father looked at me from the corner of his eyes. My body no longer feels bloated.”
I gave Rosaline another two doses of Magnesium-carbonicum 200C.
During the month since taken the remedy, there were lots of changes happened with both of her parents. This time, Rosaline was able to tell me more about her childhood as her memories return slowly. One day, she accidentally spilled a cup of tea on her mother’s book. “My mother went crazy, screamed at me, I put my hands to my ears and asked her to stop, then, I just cried and cried. A friend later told me that my mother used to drag me by the hair and pulled me around the house. This incident threw me off the track until yesterday morning, but I am feeling so much stronger within myself. With my work, I managed to tell them that I was scared to come back to work – that was the truth. I couldn’t have done this even just a month ago because I would feel too ashamed about not being good enough. My body has made a lot of changes, and relationship with dad has shifted gently.” After that incident with her mother, Rosaline realised that her earache was a psychosomatic reaction to her mother’s abusive ways toward her. Now Rosaline realises why she has always put her hair up and swept back into a bun - has always been her preferred hairstyle.
Now it is seven months into her treatment, since the issue with her mother came up, so I asked Rosaline if she wouldn’t mind my giving her an experimental remedy. She says “Of course not, whatever you think that it is right for me.”
So I gave her Magnesium-carbonicum-muriaticum 200C.
My reason for giving Rosaline this remedy is because the issues with regard to her parents are still coming up onto the surface, though she did very well on the Magnesium-carbonicum it manifested the accident of spilling a cup of tea on her mother’s book that provoked such a violent reaction from her. I took that to be the right time to work on both aspects within her.
To a child, the parents are the World Parents who are all powerful. Instead of the loving, caring parents who are one’s entire world they were threatening, violent, and over powering toward a child who is refined with great sensitivity. Rosaline, ever since she was a little girl, she acted like a squashed cabbage leaf, felt that she had no right to her existence. Not surprisingly, she put everyone else’s needs before her own and could not stand up for her right to be who she is – bullied at home, bullied at work, bullied by friends – the pattern continues to follow one from one environment to another like a shadow.
As soon as Rosaline took the remedy during the consultation, she says that her upper body feels taller, she is calmer, and the remedy tastes sweeter. The right ear still feels numb, swollen, injured. Few minutes later, she says that she feels the ear is moving – the swelling is gone down and the pain is gone also. The eyes are brighter, feeling calmer and feeling that she is back into her own body.
On her next visit, “It’s incredible how the remedy is changing every aspects of my life. I now realised that the critical voice in my head belongs to my parents. The remedy gives me a sense of being centred, I feel that all of my fragments have all come back to me.” From here on, Rosaline received Magnesium-carbonicum-muriaticum 1M (3 doses all up). She is planning to go overseas for a holiday, life is just keep on getting better, both parents have changed the way they relate to Rosaline. “Now I am coming into my own. This remedy dug out some really deep stuff.” She goes on to say that: “I am getting clearer within myself, and can feel my face. I can trust my self and my intuition much more. The slow release and development assisted by the remedies taught me the difference between assertiveness and anger.”
This is the end of case, of the nine months of Rosaline’s personal journey with many ups and downs, with many scary times as well as those times of elation and triumphs. Rosaline booked a month long holiday overseas – the first time that she is able to travel by herself without fear. What she has shown me throughout this journey was her perseverance and determination to be healed even though the journey was frightening and full of uncertainty and at times, the repressed memories of abuse and anger surface with frightening sense of un-realness. But now her softly spoken manner exudes inner strength instead of fear and uncertainty. Her gradually developed trust in herself and in her intuition reveals the grounding in her feminine soul, in her body – “My fragments have all come back to me.”
Ai-Ling Su Makewell
Keywords: magnesium carbonicum muriaticum, element theory