Remedy code: 3-665.42.13.
Woman aged 40.Warily on the phone. Now as she sits opposite me I see a strong persuasive eager finely built young woman.
Reason for coming: 2 ½ years ago I had a hernia, no work since.
I am at a kind of resting point, an in-between phase. I want to get back into action but I'm stuck.
Am in the event business. Can organise very well. Theatre, TV
productions. Really big (world) events.
Passionate, I worked really hard and achieved a lot in that world but I
didn't feel like ‘now I'm good’.
I had a small agency and a boss who collected the money but knew nothing.
I did everything myself.
My whole life ‘oh there's Rose again’. Did 8 events on my
by myself and they did 12 events with 8 people.
I have a strong power that I can and will. Wow, that's what I'm going for. A strong power of persuasion; then sit at the table with clients and then
they believe in it.
But there is a basic insecurity and that is my pitfall. I go on and on, can
no limits.
All my life I've done what I wanted, I've always gone ahead.
I radiate eagerness. Full of energy, enthusiasm and also that everything is still possible and everything is still possible.
The ‘intuition’ that was me but as soon as I showed it to the outside world.
I was far too preoccupied with the other person while I had the intention of working from within myself.
I am by nature punctual and structural and on top of that I am busy with
the outside world, pleasing everyone and not giving my limits. Then
so badly because I want recognition.
For example, I then please my boss so much that I destroy myself, which manifests itself in a hernia in May 2011. That showed me that's not how it works. Back to the basis and that's where I am now. Waiting for a turnaround to get back to work.
I have done so much in my life, it has to be done in a different way.
Am now 40: no job, no relationship because before that I was living outside myself. life.
Am now gaining insights from rest and meditation. But something may
happen again but I don't know how to get the balance back.
I was only doing things that made me happy.
Because of the hernia, I was called back but now I'm not so sure
how to get back to my old way of life.
I want to feel the fire in me instead of being busy convincing another person.
I don't have something concrete in me of this is not going to happen to me again. I am still not clear in my being.
Youth:
2nd of 3 girls.
Very dominant non-sensitive mother and eldest sister.
My father was a very creative man. I am the creation of a very strong
organisational male mother and an insecure imaginative sensitive
father who both have big prejudices and are very judgmental.
In family constellations, I expressed everything to my parents. I am really
at peace with them. But my sister can still make me feel small.
I never felt I was a part of the family.
I compensate for missing belonging by being present, being seen
being seen. I give a lot. Look at me, look at me.
I've done all the shows Everything.
Not being seen in what you did, no attention, not counting, not mattering
matter.
I was told I was difficult, I stood in the way of other people's happiness.
I was not contributing but detracting.
I always felt guilty and I wanted to avoid at all costs that another
other person from being unhappy because of me.
Keeping all balls high and sensing very sensitively what the other person needs.
Pleasing everyone and making everyone happy so as not to be a burden to others.
I act from my child-energy because then you can't be punished, then
you mean it innocently.
I feel good in my skin but the judgement of others breaks me.
I stay too little with myself while I want to stand for who I am.
My channels are too much outward, 1,000 tentacles in me are outward
outwards.
And my critical thermometer about myself is very high.
Judge, judge, judge. E.g. I talk too much, I talk too muddled.
I let myself be put out of my place by my sister, my boss, a man, by
authorities.
My very existence depends on their judgement.
I need them to see that I have done well.
I have allowed myself to be undermined. To feel that you are difficult.
Didn't stay with myself and now I'm afraid I'm out of it.
I radiate: I want the whole world. All kinds of men approach me but I don't get
to the core because I don't know myself.
I am on a thousand leaps, there is a world of jobs, of beautiful men
for me.
I could start in Dubai in no time. The whole world is at my feet but I am
so critical that I don't get anywhere. Most people have nothing and
would be happy with a little bit. I am often disappointed and am afraid
making a choice that could turn out wrong.My mother has always brought me up with the idea that I should become Übermensch
become. Perfection, perfection. And I am that now and then . . . . I might as well
might as well die.
I have lost my main goal of becoming Übermensch because I have reached the top of the
summit.
I did eight productions at once.
All I want is what I can't control.
Everything I can direct I have done.
Everything is possible but actually, for me, not much needs to be done.
I also got tired not of a production but of a boss who wouldn't give me an
hour off, yelling at me and not treating me with respect. Just
like my mother, it's never good.
When I left, it took 4 people to replace me. So I did
quite a lot but I only found that out when I couldn't move because of the hernia.
move.
My mother made me do and be like Übermensch. I could never stay with
myself. I was never hungry, never thirsty, never basic needs. I went
to the toilet once a day. My mother determined, never learned to feel what I
myself needed. You didn't bother.
Also when a man said ‘we are going to do this’ I always said ‘nice, nice, nice’ but I
didn't say ‘I need you to be sweet’.
I do give myself love with plants and flowers.
Chaos in my energy who I am, thousands of sensors. I know who I am,
but there is so much fantasy through it.
I would like to radiate a unified energy instead of all these thousands of
possibilities.
I did everything from a child energy, now I'm 40 and want to act from an
adult energy.
Child energy? For instance, I had never done anything with TV and after preliminary work I call with
guts, audacity and knowledge to Discovery Channel and then I do a
programme in 15 countries.
My hair is not growing now. I had a very big bunch of hair. Now a lot of fall out.
Analysis 66542.13:6
Angiospermae : vibrant, sensitive, no 3rd person, multiple
themes?
6
Lanthanides : always going own way. Reflective.
Looking beyond your nose. Thinks big.
Busy with big things, big inventions.
66
Asteranae : proactive, reflective. Acting on own initiative
5 Silver
Series : Being in the centre of attention. Like to be in the
limelight.
665
Lamiidae : on the one hand, strong desire to perform and
show oneself as special. At the same time, there is a reflection
on this behaviour of wanting to be famous and wanting to
shine.4
Stage 4 : confident, convinced of oneself. Great
obviousness.
6654
Rubiales : good self-confidence, feel confident and special, they
feel entitled to a good creative job. A
desire to be special.
2
Subphase 2 : passive; adapting, working hard just to get the
approval.
66542
Rubioideae : duality between confident and shy, between
going their own way and adapting to others.
13
Stage 13 : achieved everything and now stuck, procrastinating.
Prescription:
Morinda citrifolia MK.
Follow up 4 weeks:The first day after taking it, it was like having mushrooms. I saw everything colourful. All the animals came to me, all the butterflies on my
arm, everyone said hello.
The second day I hung out in my hammock all day.
After that: the universe automatically gave me the good energy.
Cycled with my parents, including to my birthplace. Mother told me that
that was an intense time and that she snarled at us all the time.
My parents are suddenly being super nice and yesterday I received father and mother's acknowledgement. My mother said I was a lot calmer and that she was was proud of me.
I am working on a lot. All sorts of ideas but no action flows.
Prescription:
Morinda citrifolia MK.
Follow up 10 and 16 weeks:My energy is back.
I don't block anymore. I see the possibilities instead of the impossibilities.
If I compare myself to a rose:
I was a very big flower, just giving but I had
insufficient strength and bearing. You can think of the hernia as my
stem was snapped.
In the top, I had done everything, am now feeding my roots, my
self-esteem. I am making my rose, my outside smaller and letting it shine more towards downwards.
It was always big and look at my outside.
I used to be so affected, damaged in my base that I made my flower bigger
and bigger. Look at me, standing in the spotlight and you're just giving yourself just giving yourself away.
As a girl of 7, I was already connecting. I made e.g. and wake-up system of marbles for the whole street. I would pull a rope and it would ring at all the houses and everyone would come to our garden. Then I would open the gate and we would play tag. If you jumped over the swing you were in another world and you couldn't be tapped. I could puzzle for hours. Now I can spend hours on the floor doing process control, all kinds of cogs, 50 sheets spread out.
The more complex, the more challenging.
At school, I puzzled over chemically organic compounds. By final exam I had a 10 for chemistry.
Am now working on something so complex that no one can take that away from me.
I can now also keep this to myself instead of ‘look at me, look at me’.
Now this is my thing, my puzzle and I won't show it until it's completely finished.
Then I will realise em. Not already ‘look at me’.
Am working on a new invention. Can't tell much about it.
Keywords are: communication, international, that everyone is going to
use it, my idea worlds and reach people in their feelings. Like
before, I am going to build the framework and others are going to make it technically possible make it possible.
I was ashamed of thinking so big. Now ‘throw open that container and
think even bigger’.
I compare myself to a horse. I protect the herd instead of my own ego.
I am a fighter, I will do anything for another person, but before I used to fight for someone else's interest (boss, parents, relationship). I was not protecting myself.
This week I went through a process where I beat up my very visual
beaten up. My sister tyrannized me all my life and I have now put a
halted.
Always felt like the underdog. Got no attention. Pain, even later in my
work, was my focus.
That undermined the lump of energy in me. I was ashamed of my rich
I had to hide it.
I acted from my child-energy.
Missed that maturity and I am building that now.
I'm now working on the basis, connecting with the outside world and being proud of who I am.
can be proud of who I am. That I contribute and am not the hindering factor but the stimulus.
With inspiration instead of convincing people with outward-looking conviction. Not by shining and giving myself away.
It was: look at me.
Now: found my being.
My goal now: being open and connecting with my being.
AnalysisThe case fits very well the description of
Morinda citrifolia in Wonderful
Plants, page 654.
Follow upShe did very well.