AnalysisCautious handling autonomy and love
Cautious over handling autonomy and staying lovable
Avoiding independence to avoid not being loved
Alternating between independence and love
Autonomy is unrealistic due to lack of love
A domineering lover makes them cautious
Husband avoids autonomy
Cautious lover
A cautious husband hinders independence
As a lover avoiding autonomy
Avoiding the inner world for fear of losing love
Alternating between self-control and love
Cautious handling autonomy and loveThe main problem can be seen as how to handle cautiously love and autonomy. They want to be autonomous and be loved. It’s difficult to combine independence and love. It will make them cautious, handling situations carefully. But that can lead them to becoming so cautious and prudent, that they only make plans and never really go for it.
A domineering lover makes them cautiousThe opposite can be true too, that their lover wants to push them into self-control. But they aren't able yet to be in control of themselves and thus become anxious. They fear that they cannot do what their lover tries to force them to and avoid taking on the power.
As a lover avoiding autonomyThey desire to be free but the care of their spouse absorbs them so much that they can’t do it. They will try from time to time but have to give up out of the feeling that that will lead to lack of care. They can alternate between independence and care.
They can alternate markedly between trying to be in control of themselves and being a lover.