Author: Jan Scholten
Sad, from having no contacts, no friends.
Mascara running down from tears, desire to be beautiful but becoming ugly from weeping and grief.
Feels like cotton, hay.
Too wooly, too soft and vague.
Outsider, tolerated, unseen.
Student, early twenties.
Feeling that one will be abused when being too nice and kind.
Feeling that when one is not nice enough one will be left alone.
Dilemma of retiring or going forward.
Always nervous, alert, trembling; never relaxed.
Nervous: trembling, whole body.
Head: pressing pain in forehead.
Lungs: asthma, allergic; bronchitis; cough from tickling in throat.