Sense proving, 27-3-2021, Utrecht, Helena van Dijk.
Prover 1Mini tree. Woody, the crown as a funnel, you fall into it but not deep, it keeps you high as a tree can do. Softly moving along on tis branches. Hér branches. Very feminine, elegant but also masculine. I feel my sexuality and there is something about it. It is half, or unequal of lob-sided. Not yet ready? Not in balance. Half man half woman? Caring, looking after one another, as care but also like coquetterie, looking back over your shoulder and winking, are you coming? Inviting. A bit dark, you make something of life but it ain’t easy. Seeking contact to make it liveable but in the end… the feelings you have about it you have to bare yourself. Wherever you are in life. Endure, well, I don’t do that consciously, I just don’t have a choice. It is okay when I’m alone with myself, I’m okay with what/who I am then. But a lot is not accepted. Although I’ve always been there in my way. Friendly. As if for myself. Accepting but also having to experience being spat out. Distant, only a part acts with distance, the main part (in me, and the surrounding) is okay with it.