Proving: meditation proving; 5-4-2018, Rottenburg, 8 provers
Prover 1A dream of two nights ago comes up in the meditation.
I enter a scene where a charity bazaar for children with special needs is prepared.
People (women) are busy. I offer my help. Only one lady reacts and shows me some minor activities to contribute. I finish them and ask again how I could help. This time no one reacts. I feel like I was nobody. No one sees me, no one listens to me.
I sit down at the scene. A young child approaches me. We do not speak but touch each other, tenderly. We smile.
I change for another place, still ignored by the adults. But more children approach me. They enjoy being close, so do I. They smile. Bald headed smiling faces. Hard to distinguish, they lack individual features in their faces. Toddlers up to primary school age.
Is the charity event for them? Children on chemotherapy? Mentally handicapped?
I am no one, nobody, and they gather around me.
I am no one, cannot say if I am male or female.
If I looked out of the window, I would see my wife with a good looking guy, having fun with him. I do not risk the look. She would be right. I would understand. I am no one, I lack personality, I am not interesting to anyone. Just sick children approach me, gather around me. We smile and we enjoy being there, being in the moment.
Nothing else is possible. Nothing else is needed.
Prover 2Dream: A governor/stadtholder in cruel times, residing in a huge tower amidst a city. He tortures and eventually kills people brought to him, suspected to be critical of the regime.
Once the regime is abolished, citizens enter the tower in order to take revenge. They are bound to torture the man and finally kill him, as a just punishment.
Yet, as they meet the former governor, he no longer carries the uniform and appears as a nice citizen, just like they are, sharing their opinions, happy that the hard times are over.
He looks so honest and faithful and plain, that revenge is impossible.
(He is not a turncoat, someone who tries to save his life by lying. Once he wore a uniform, he acted accordingly. Now he wears a coat like everyone else, so he is like everyone else.)
You cannot nail a pudding on the wall.
Patients who come back many times. They insist of being better from the remedies you gave them, yet you don‘t notice a change. You see the remedies in them you want to see.
Prover 3Frozen from shock - from seeing something horrible - but cannot talke or even think about - cannot talk about the trauma (War trauma, our parents, soldiers)
DD.
Solanales, can talk about the trauma.
Do not speak about your trauma and try to live a normal life.
They love to live.
Threat, Survivalist, do not let me destroy.
Pre lingual, children, newborn.
Longing for protection - complacency - modest, undemanding.
No grounding.
They have no possibility to change their life, confusion, no control about their life.
Week identity.
No one place to life - homeless, nomads.
No claims - satisfied with what they get.
Brains are sensitive to dehydration.
Can perform little and thus have little.
Too much input can be harmful for a moss personality.
Feminin, matriarchy.
Movie: Das weisse Band.
Indications: Psychose, Down Syndrom, Traumatic brain injury, Epilepsy, Neurosis, Borderline,
Dementia.
The White Ribbon - A German Children's Story is a feature film by Austrian director Michael Haneke from the year 2009. The plot of the black and white film is located in the year before the beginning of the First World War in northern Germany and describes mysterious incidents in the fictional village Eichwald. The film illustrates the distressing, especially for the adolescent traumatizing social and interpersonal climate of the time, which is characterized even in the close family of oppression and contempt, abuse and abuse as well as frustration and emotional distance. He takes a critical look at the strict Protestantism.
Prover 4
A king, warm, protecting, laughing.
Elves, refined, floating.
Gnomes, working, planting, working for the plants.
Fairy tale world.
Matriarchy.
Happy life, till something happens, then total confusion, not knowing what to do, how to cope.
Hobbits, hobbit country, Lord of the rings atmosphere.