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Erythroxylum coca
Year 2022, Issue 41CaseAuthor: Anne Wirtz
My namesophies world - something to do with Godess -Why did your parents choose - my mother has scand. infl.
my ount is called ouselinemy mother said I was spesialI felt isolated in my childhoodI dont know how to understandi like to wear headressed,hat
they sID IT ALWAYS LOOOOKED GOODthis was because of differnet in sourandingsI was good in art I painted
paretns suport me got studieParents liked unik ness in memy sister got nothingmy siter =MI = Fnothing was left for sister, her name is petra
WEEp,A: WHY ? SHE WAS SO SENSITIVE
sister disase suposed to be a boy
I protected her alwaysatmosphere at home terible, no.when father spilt egg jolk, they fought
disproporsinal to cause, they could not manage relationship
when come home, i could feel the athmosphere
a: most be sensitive rem
no place for us, obnly for work
which role did you play? I was always the mediator
As a child i thought I cant change it, but.
this was rubish
this is what am doing to day,always,also in pub, where I talk with the miserable people
(parents hotel w pub)
WEEP:all this young men, who drowned themself in alcohol (=sister) I was a good listener
I tried why i do to day, to unerstnd,and help throuhg understanding
compensat: what can I do to make my own feeling reliefedI was condemed to do so, i could not escape.
I had a girlfriend, 2houses down road, after 20 min F&M called my back
there was no possibility to escape (= with the drunk & sister)
I do not want it to sound dramatic but it was awfull
((ser ut som rogers cone))
parent hotell 3 kids, she it alot, and put to prison w water and bread without serious causse, she locked us up.
we where the outlet for her, we where subjected to her.
I try to alter it al the time, as I remember it.
When I left village, I regularly got depressed on sundays.
why on sundays
I only function on workingi pressed down feeling,when work it is easieri remeber being foced to go on family outings on sunfdays
3 smaal children, father smoke cigar, and the bad athmosphere betwen them.biggest problem uptil now is not to isolate my self in private life
i quicly sense closeness as being treatening
so need to keep certain distance
(feeling behind) I feel like I am a spektator wathicn move of others
and strong sense of lonliness.I feel terified, that i might end up in marriage = parentsreaction in life?
I compensat all in work.
when i realise i get restless
i have to escape(which groups of remedies escape fromlife)this are the drugs
they escape out of lifeI cant bear it but cant change it, nothing is moving felt it for 20 years atleast
egt vorse when close, tried all kind of terapies
i understand why, but cant change it
I asked again what is it you cant move a milimeter on
TO get out of isolation
is lie a magic”socket”?
It was different when took platina-but did not last
took platine salt.
just short effekt
same with aurum
all this lifted but did not last, simili
she is very sensitive
I am always sensitive
in child called me, mimosa
trired remedy = 0
I have to cut of, like wathing a movie
I had a good ear for musikk
i played piano when five
i feel vibraton on phone,feel how somebody feels
I cannond stand disharmony in musik, off tune
when tape recorder is I cant stand it
but my senses are reduced no
strong sense of smeell
I note faster than others alarm signalsI get a whole in my mind,i am not present
something is not there, then I dont sense anything
like a light swich then there is nothing therea: for sure you are here but it feels like you are not---this is major point
I gave 2 wrong remediesI ask to writethought
feelinggggaction,reaction----
summary
we wehre treated by mother if ddid not abi had stock hit us for anything, emrciless
ilike to eascape, but she hit me when out
water and bread
punishment exrcrusiating,feel tortured
felt I must be wrong
then in room, prison isolatin uptill2 weeks
i fellt alone
i tried to be a head, never be a target
how
i tried to understand despertly feeling s of other
i dthat momnet i did not exist anymore
= invisible
MArs-venus
-----
video follow up sendt
i willl try to expalin why so said, it is a feeling of isolaion.
(øyne går in i seg selv,åpne)-----------sensation of isolation
I was something spesial - isolated
high sensitivitySAd stories affect her profoundlysister hurt, drunkersindustrioussound in eararytrocilon,cocasundays ?
R. sadness 6 pm
when depetion saw deep go to sleep
R: sadness with drowsinessmountain reemdy altitude HighR anxiety dysp in veta
fer high placs
aviator
airpla agg
faint ascen
mount sick
Mind
deise fat of strng
des activ
industroi and in night
elated
clearness sought
del beautifullDOWN, in the wayfear fallin
fear motion down
fear falling
feall falling ehn let things falll
faintnes on ascendin mountainsFIght AGAINS ITdreams figt w sick or sevbn black generals who gaoored him and boun.
Mind; fear driving from place to placedeptsBusiness won out
confution mnd, res drowsiness
anguis agg effort straive
avertion society
des rem mbed
timidity
dirtiness
washing always hands
will loss of
will weakness of
work no skill in
forsaken felling
horribel things sad stroies affect her profoundly
sadness despondency,eveningg seix pm
sadness with drowsiness---where in case is high & depsI was unikeI felt isolation
turmente tortured
Letter; but there is still digninty in my
nema = gondness
divine plant of incas
sensitiv to musik
could feel vibrations everwher
wsmeell alarm sighnalsgot dump, i cant see proper anymore etcintersrsting; She is one founder of hom clinic in Nepal.FU: I see ofthen; Not dreama before but afterI FEEL VERY GOOD, tried 70 diff remedies
i felt what did, this is different
past becoems non importantgot wors fysical, strong coughtbut 1 day startd to get emotional relief
realised i was abel to wait
((mandel ansikt))
so many things hapepend
it is a fast triain
past do not affect me
i dreamt a dream (first remedy did that)
little gitrl w dult
wanted to buy iscream,claimed stairs
little girl met man
old woman looked back girl lost
no fearknow it has some meaningshe got lost.2-3 days laterinterersting dream
ha d to go trough tunnel,with boat
started w no diving suite
had to go trought tunel to get to boat
i coud not enter lower part since no oksigen
could not get there without oksuygen
all friend had diving suice,could enter top, had the chanche
i saw myself going up without suite
---
A, like big ferries axient, cant survive down there
--
dream cont.
A hero has to win fight,bring up and down togehterwe where sitting there talk, see became wild, boat paraleell to ways
high ways
we had strong fear
Captain managed, to go with wawes = hom
got somewhere, something like a mountain, survived
principle of town imortant man came
Means it was like a birth, through channel, reaced new place,like Noahs ark
bad from past gone, start from zero.Jung, archetypical dreams = deep point within yourselfsitt togher w people = no isolation--------feeelt very good
depretion ddid not come back
I reali understand now
future,no fear of isolation anymore(flower dress)felt i cant stopp, no boundies, cant be agressive.
this is dengaerous
be selective who is non attacing
felt I had been tortured, had to withdrow
as i soul sitting i corner
meaing of first dream; i got lost
could not come out of corner
felling of tortured so strong, saw things; i ccant resist,protect,only could hideTry to.
more realex,could not stand sopeoperas where other persons are treated badly
other person so must hurt
in radio a game, not alowwed to say yes,no,or black or white, i had to swtivch of
purpose ddi this to each other
boricjhe,sense of right and wrong aboished
high plant, starogig branche
oval
flower green
fruit = whirte cherries, grow in andesreduced adiction. ?ccoain = alcaloidcocain bloces conduction of ar.anger isapear
worked capsity
senses increaedmost addictedjuppies,arties,musci
high sensitiv
coca cola containe it first
was forbidden
instead put dcoffein
culture of incas
coca was secret,fear of falling,high culturefeeling of thisrst.indians did not fight back.take coca
only utlett is culture
going to other sphere
feel isolated,has meening
this is how i survivedI am intrersted in musikkwhent to venuesuella
I learned the songs
i evn sang in spnish in nightsong, atracted toMeans.
bwith black salavi with try to take away you melancolia
why you slowly climb montain of your life
theme dominted foreign power
if sad and weepy this is the way it is
black salay = cocasings.isolation cann i and anah.
anaholonium; merge w surrondiing
Nancy
I had good respnce myselfvoice speakesr tiredmuch betterpation for mountains,hillswork-i have alot of energy-work better fysikal
hom at desk probl
love to work in garden
colors,visual is extremly strong
vision is hightend
= drug remediessound of bird, pirces meeverythig stops
sensitivy
strongly atuned
being slone is satiesfiig -in garden, w birds,flowersdeeper state; impretion abilitystrong sense of longnig for uite
being w the one belowed
spiritual longing feeling
Think this is stron in coca and drugs
my ount is called ouselinemy mother said I was spesialI felt isolated in my childhoodI dont know how to understandi like to wear headressed,hat
they sID IT ALWAYS LOOOOKED GOODthis was because of differnet in sourandingsI was good in art I painted
paretns suport me got studieParents liked unik ness in memy sister got nothingmy siter =MI = Fnothing was left for sister, her name is petra
WEEp,A: WHY ? SHE WAS SO SENSITIVE
sister disase suposed to be a boy
I protected her alwaysatmosphere at home terible, no.when father spilt egg jolk, they fought
disproporsinal to cause, they could not manage relationship
when come home, i could feel the athmosphere
a: most be sensitive rem
no place for us, obnly for work
which role did you play? I was always the mediator
As a child i thought I cant change it, but.
this was rubish
this is what am doing to day,always,also in pub, where I talk with the miserable people
(parents hotel w pub)
WEEP:all this young men, who drowned themself in alcohol (=sister) I was a good listener
I tried why i do to day, to unerstnd,and help throuhg understanding
compensat: what can I do to make my own feeling reliefedI was condemed to do so, i could not escape.
I had a girlfriend, 2houses down road, after 20 min F&M called my back
there was no possibility to escape (= with the drunk & sister)
I do not want it to sound dramatic but it was awfull
((ser ut som rogers cone))
parent hotell 3 kids, she it alot, and put to prison w water and bread without serious causse, she locked us up.
we where the outlet for her, we where subjected to her.
I try to alter it al the time, as I remember it.
When I left village, I regularly got depressed on sundays.
why on sundays
I only function on workingi pressed down feeling,when work it is easieri remeber being foced to go on family outings on sunfdays
3 smaal children, father smoke cigar, and the bad athmosphere betwen them.biggest problem uptil now is not to isolate my self in private life
i quicly sense closeness as being treatening
so need to keep certain distance
(feeling behind) I feel like I am a spektator wathicn move of others
and strong sense of lonliness.I feel terified, that i might end up in marriage = parentsreaction in life?
I compensat all in work.
when i realise i get restless
i have to escape(which groups of remedies escape fromlife)this are the drugs
they escape out of lifeI cant bear it but cant change it, nothing is moving felt it for 20 years atleast
egt vorse when close, tried all kind of terapies
i understand why, but cant change it
I asked again what is it you cant move a milimeter on
TO get out of isolation
is lie a magic”socket”?
It was different when took platina-but did not last
took platine salt.
just short effekt
same with aurum
all this lifted but did not last, simili
she is very sensitive
I am always sensitive
in child called me, mimosa
trired remedy = 0
I have to cut of, like wathing a movie
I had a good ear for musikk
i played piano when five
i feel vibraton on phone,feel how somebody feels
I cannond stand disharmony in musik, off tune
when tape recorder is I cant stand it
but my senses are reduced no
strong sense of smeell
I note faster than others alarm signalsI get a whole in my mind,i am not present
something is not there, then I dont sense anything
like a light swich then there is nothing therea: for sure you are here but it feels like you are not---this is major point
I gave 2 wrong remediesI ask to writethought
feelinggggaction,reaction----
summary
we wehre treated by mother if ddid not abi had stock hit us for anything, emrciless
ilike to eascape, but she hit me when out
water and bread
punishment exrcrusiating,feel tortured
felt I must be wrong
then in room, prison isolatin uptill2 weeks
i fellt alone
i tried to be a head, never be a target
how
i tried to understand despertly feeling s of other
i dthat momnet i did not exist anymore
= invisible
MArs-venus
-----
video follow up sendt
i willl try to expalin why so said, it is a feeling of isolaion.
(øyne går in i seg selv,åpne)-----------sensation of isolation
I was something spesial - isolated
high sensitivitySAd stories affect her profoundlysister hurt, drunkersindustrioussound in eararytrocilon,cocasundays ?
R. sadness 6 pm
when depetion saw deep go to sleep
R: sadness with drowsinessmountain reemdy altitude HighR anxiety dysp in veta
fer high placs
aviator
airpla agg
faint ascen
mount sick
Mind
deise fat of strng
des activ
industroi and in night
elated
clearness sought
del beautifullDOWN, in the wayfear fallin
fear motion down
fear falling
feall falling ehn let things falll
faintnes on ascendin mountainsFIght AGAINS ITdreams figt w sick or sevbn black generals who gaoored him and boun.
Mind; fear driving from place to placedeptsBusiness won out
confution mnd, res drowsiness
anguis agg effort straive
avertion society
des rem mbed
timidity
dirtiness
washing always hands
will loss of
will weakness of
work no skill in
forsaken felling
horribel things sad stroies affect her profoundly
sadness despondency,eveningg seix pm
sadness with drowsiness---where in case is high & depsI was unikeI felt isolation
turmente tortured
Letter; but there is still digninty in my
nema = gondness
divine plant of incas
sensitiv to musik
could feel vibrations everwher
wsmeell alarm sighnalsgot dump, i cant see proper anymore etcintersrsting; She is one founder of hom clinic in Nepal.FU: I see ofthen; Not dreama before but afterI FEEL VERY GOOD, tried 70 diff remedies
i felt what did, this is different
past becoems non importantgot wors fysical, strong coughtbut 1 day startd to get emotional relief
realised i was abel to wait
((mandel ansikt))
so many things hapepend
it is a fast triain
past do not affect me
i dreamt a dream (first remedy did that)
little gitrl w dult
wanted to buy iscream,claimed stairs
little girl met man
old woman looked back girl lost
no fearknow it has some meaningshe got lost.2-3 days laterinterersting dream
ha d to go trough tunnel,with boat
started w no diving suite
had to go trought tunel to get to boat
i coud not enter lower part since no oksigen
could not get there without oksuygen
all friend had diving suice,could enter top, had the chanche
i saw myself going up without suite
---
A, like big ferries axient, cant survive down there
--
dream cont.
A hero has to win fight,bring up and down togehterwe where sitting there talk, see became wild, boat paraleell to ways
high ways
we had strong fear
Captain managed, to go with wawes = hom
got somewhere, something like a mountain, survived
principle of town imortant man came
Means it was like a birth, through channel, reaced new place,like Noahs ark
bad from past gone, start from zero.Jung, archetypical dreams = deep point within yourselfsitt togher w people = no isolation--------feeelt very good
depretion ddid not come back
I reali understand now
future,no fear of isolation anymore(flower dress)felt i cant stopp, no boundies, cant be agressive.
this is dengaerous
be selective who is non attacing
felt I had been tortured, had to withdrow
as i soul sitting i corner
meaing of first dream; i got lost
could not come out of corner
felling of tortured so strong, saw things; i ccant resist,protect,only could hideTry to.
more realex,could not stand sopeoperas where other persons are treated badly
other person so must hurt
in radio a game, not alowwed to say yes,no,or black or white, i had to swtivch of
purpose ddi this to each other
boricjhe,sense of right and wrong aboished
high plant, starogig branche
oval
flower green
fruit = whirte cherries, grow in andesreduced adiction. ?ccoain = alcaloidcocain bloces conduction of ar.anger isapear
worked capsity
senses increaedmost addictedjuppies,arties,musci
high sensitiv
coca cola containe it first
was forbidden
instead put dcoffein
culture of incas
coca was secret,fear of falling,high culturefeeling of thisrst.indians did not fight back.take coca
only utlett is culture
going to other sphere
feel isolated,has meening
this is how i survivedI am intrersted in musikkwhent to venuesuella
I learned the songs
i evn sang in spnish in nightsong, atracted toMeans.
bwith black salavi with try to take away you melancolia
why you slowly climb montain of your life
theme dominted foreign power
if sad and weepy this is the way it is
black salay = cocasings.isolation cann i and anah.
anaholonium; merge w surrondiing
Nancy
I had good respnce myselfvoice speakesr tiredmuch betterpation for mountains,hillswork-i have alot of energy-work better fysikal
hom at desk probl
love to work in garden
colors,visual is extremly strong
vision is hightend
= drug remediessound of bird, pirces meeverythig stops
sensitivy
strongly atuned
being slone is satiesfiig -in garden, w birds,flowersdeeper state; impretion abilitystrong sense of longnig for uite
being w the one belowed
spiritual longing feeling
Think this is stron in coca and drugs