Author: Martin Jakob
A moss remedy from Thuidiaceae
Case by Martin Jakob
A 34 year old woman suffers from PMS with severe menstrual pain, the blood is very clotty and she has a thyroid insufficiency. (She has read Jan Scholten's book with the Secret Lanthanides and she says there is a light for her, in this book she has found herself again and therefore she comes to me.) She says that she has difficulties to handle pressure and stress. The worst of all is that she suffers from confusion and hopelessness in this stressful situations, when several things come together she has a kind of are mental fainting fits. (Confused, overwhelmed = moss)
She has a lump in her throat in difficult situations or when she is the centre of attention. She says she is very unstable because of her new job and her recurring relationship problems. She can't handle criticism well. (Stage 2, DD Phase 2/ poor self-esteem = moss) She searches for herself all the time, "who am I". She dares less than she is able to do. She says she doesn't want to hurt others, she wants to help others. She thinks she has fine feelers, but she feels overwhelmed with them, she doesn't know how to deal with them.
She originally comes from the Kosovo and when the war broke out there (war trauma = moss) she had flee with her family. (Confused of a loss, take a moss) She had lived in Kosovo in a village with her family, her grandparents and her uncles and aunts. (like a clan? = Silicium Series 300) Before they were allowed to enter the country, they spent a year in a refugee camp (without a home, without a permanent residence, on the run = moss). She can remember the escape when the bus in which they drove was stopped and searched by soldiers with weapons at the ready.
She quickly learned the German language, but was always different. (no home, do not belong = moos) They lived in a very small town where there were hardly any foreigners.
Today she works in a company dealing with natural products, she says she " I muddle my way through" - she has phases in her work where she feels completely overwhelmed. (They can feel like teenagers or childlike who doesn't know how to deal with serious problems = moss) She loves her job, she thinks it's a great thing, but the mood in the company is often difficult and she can't separate herself from it, the mood affects her too much. (vulnerable, soft, easy hurt = moos) She wants to go deeper into the matter of natural products, especially plants.
In her youth she had a boyfriend, her parents were against her relation with him, he was not a Muslim, she was forbidden to be with him. This resulted was an incredible confusion of her feelings, like anger, frustration etc. During this time she had "screwed up" her final exam. That was a shock (moss) for her, that her mother had pushed her so far, that she could no longer think clearly. Her mother always tried to uphold her religion and culture, the others were always the other people, we are Islamic. As a girl it was difficult, the femininity was not supported (phase 2), she was not allowed to have a friend from another religion.
She gave in (with her boyfriend) (giving in, adapting = phase 2), it was a hopeless situation. „As a woman you are small (phase 2), where I come from a woman is of little value, that is still the case - you don't have much to decide - you have to go to the kitchen - girls are brought up that way - in the kitchen, there you have something to decide“. (Phase 6 = not estimated).
The messed up graduation was difficult for her, she always wanted to prove that she could make it in her new home, (stage 6) to be from another culture and still make it. Her family had decided, that her relation with her boyfriend is not possible - "I had a mental blackout - I was overwhelmed - my soul screams and you can't get out". I couldn't concentrate on learning and I couldn't think anymore. It was like losing myself, being present, but not having contact with oneself. One want to say something - but one cannot do it - formulate a sentence that comes out of out of once mouth wasn’t possible, a lump thick and big in your throat….. (unable to speak, prelingual, confusion, the trauma of expulsion and war, shines through again? or are re-traumatization?).
Mother: She missed a real mother - „everything what one as a woman is, the feeling that is given to you, you are good as you are“ - a female support this what she did not get. (Support = Phase 2) She was bossy, pedantic, clean and neat and raised us to function well on the outside. (to adjust = phase 2)
Father: He was never present, always working, trying to build us an existence here (never there = phase 6) Her brother was hyperactive and was often beaten by her father, she also got beaten. (Abuse = Phase 6)
What she learned in her family of origin is, "if you are as you are, you are bad" (this implies Phase 2 adjusting and Phase 6 otherwise until you are worth nothing).
Later she meets a man also from the Kosovo, her parents decide that they shout marry. She says "I never found it hard to fall in love". She thought, it would happen that this relationship will deepen - it will take a while….. Her children were born. The first child was a cry-baby she was totally overwhelmed with the child, also her husband was overwhelmed - he had the attitude, you are the woman you have to handle that problem.
There are difficulties with her husband's family, she tried to adapt there (phase 2), but the relationship with her mother-in-law never fitted. There was a situation where she was thrown out of her family-in-law's house, "that pulled the floor away from under my feet - I wasn't in my body", the mother-in-law had raised her hand against her - it was brutal. She was out of action for three days - nothing she could do. (moss = traumatized, out of the body?)
She was always happy as a child in nature, even today when she is in the forest, meadows, in nature she feels comfortable.
The last sentence in the consultation is, "I don't know who I am, I only perceive myself through the outside, through the others".
Prescription: a moss remedy from Thuidiaceae 1 x 2 per week.
Moose 3-300.00.00: War, expulsion, threat, trauma; You have the feeling that it is outside your ability to do something about it, it is outside your power, you have to give in to the "will of nature or the gods". It brings them into a state of confusion in which they do not know what to say, see or do. They feel helpless, they do not know how to deal with the situation.
They feel they have no ground under their feet, both emotionally and in reality. Often they have no home or a own home. It is for normads, gypsies, homeless - (in this case they are refugees in a refugee camp, mosses have no roots) The patient suffers from her confusion and hopelessness, mental fainting fits. She used a few times the word overwhelmed.
Complaints of trauma, which are not even perceived as such, are suppressed, a problem that is difficult to trace back - war - expulsion, etcetera. Not knowing who you are - confusion.
Memories that are not accessible.
3-333.60.00 Thuidiales, Phase 6: She does not feel valued, if you are like you are you are bad, women are worth less.
3-333.62.00 Anomodonaceae, Subphase 2: < criticism, no support from her mother, outwardly function, adapt.
A moss remedy from Thuidiaceae: she wants to prove that she can also do it in another culture.
Follow up after 5 months and after 14 months:
In her relationship they have separated, she is now single mother. It was difficult for her because the conflict in her was so strong, „do I believe him (her husband) or do I believe myself". "It was again the subject of losing myself - but now I stood by myself - I accept what I am - I stand by who I am - I have always looked for myself and now I have got to know myself - I now now what I want“. "At the beginning of my marriage I couldn't say anything - I had this blockage in my throat, a tied up throat, nothing came out - now it's exactly the opposite I make myself understood and can express myself.“ (cannot speak out, prälingual, Trauma ? Moos) "The oppression I had already experienced from my mother (Phase 6), being the victim (Phase 6) I also experienced in my marriage, I just endured it. (Subphase 2)". "For me it is now clear that I don't like this man and I don't want to be trampled over myself anymore (Moos or Subphase 2)". "I'm amazed about myself from what situation I have came out - I can represent myself. I can be there as I am - it was as if I wasn't standing in my shoes - it was as if standing next to my shoes - now I am in my shoes and have floor under my feet".
After another 9 months: She thinks that this moss is a really great plant, that has a lot to do with boundaries, she realized that she was used to set too few boundaries. Now she is able to set her boundaries. The separation with her husband is not difficult for her. He blames her for everything what has gone wrong in her relation. In the few conversations she has with him it is a quarrel, but she can handle it well. "I am much more aware of myself internally, I feel myself much better, I am grounded, I feel my boundaries also physically.“ "As a child I had no limits, I adapted, I was very well behaved and nice, I do so, to arrive here in this new culture.“ "I had to be reasonable, one has to do what others say one has to follow - but I wanted to become myself".